I came to CoDA (and, for many years, Emotions Anonymous) because I was in danger of losing my marriage as well as my relationship with our kids. I was raging constantly. I got into my marriage with the notion that I was the center, I was to be catered to., I would fly into a rage if my loved ones crossed me, disagreed with me, weren’t able to be with me when I wanted them to be with me or give me what I thought I needed. I would fly into a rage simply if things didn’t go my way (in which case I would find someone to blame). It became habitual. I started 12-step when I realized that those around me would probably be better off if I were gone.
My journey has been one of maturing & learning how to behave like an adult, recognizing my needs and respecting the needs of those around me, stepping out from the center of the universe, and trying to find my rightful place in this world. It is a continuing journey, one that I’m glad to be on. I find that as I continue in the program, I am more tolerant, understanding, giving & a little less cynical, more willing to see the joy and beauty in life rather than the darkness.
Mark T – 12/22/16