Co-NNections Recovery Stories

David – 10-30-18

Before CoDA, I felt numb and unable to express my needs, wants, desires and identity in any meaningful way. I hid my expressions to blend in and to keep the peace. In CoDA, I feel a new sense of purpose and emotion which has surprised me and at the same time delighted me. I notice how raw my poetry feels and also how my truth comes from a deep place. Thank you for this gift of expression, higher power, and keep it coming.

My companions alone at night

In the darkness, my only companions are my thoughts

They are black as the night

As sharp as a stiletto

And I so love the pain 

of seeing the cracked mirror before me

of being tossed in the waves of turmoil

of craving for release and for ecstasy

of yearning for another to escape this self-loathing

That is the power of my thoughts and my emotions

It is energy that I carry inside of me and it is scary to myself

Now I imagine what would be possible if I could harness this force

If I could birth a new energy

A new me that is just a powerful and just as awesome

A new me that is complete and wanting of nothing

And when wanting of companionship, it is equal and comfortable

Tender and bounded by razor wire of self-love

This energy is unconquerable, unique, me

Creative and free

Not one to be shared

Except for the one who cared

I notice the shift

And now I don’t give it thought

If my heart is your goal

You will see the nakedness that is my soul

David N 

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