Joy
Abounds!

I
stopped carrying the weight of the world on my shoulders today.  I
don’t know why I had carried it so long.  The good Lord had tried to
get me to give it up for some time.  He allowed it to make me sick,
sad and totally depressed, but I still gripped it tight like a security
blanket.  He told me it was a sign of lacking faith in Him to hold on so
tight.  But still I would draw it near.  Didn’t He understand?  I AM
the only one who can care for those I love!  THEY couldn’t survive without
me and I couldn’t bear the thought of ever loosing them to death.  Then He reminded
me that all mankind must die, EVEN ME.  He gave me a glance of life on
earth after I was gone.  My loved ones would be fine, He would be there to
guide and protect.  He said I must move from denial and face the
truth, because it would not only set me free, but it would bring great joy to my
life.  He was oh so right!

That
was over 10 years ago.  During that 10 years, rather than worry about the
ones I love getting sick/hurt/killed/loosing their job/getting in debt/being
alone, getting lost in the world or misunderstanding me, I have tried to be
positive, supportive, non-judgmental and happy to see them each time we meet,
have fun while we are together and send them away with an "I love
you" and a silent prayer.  I don’t try to solve problems before they
exist; I just try to live one day at a time.   When there is so much
work to do that it will never get done, I choose what is required, delegate what
should be done by others, leave what must be left till tomorrow, learn to
live without some things ever getting done and make sure to have some fun each
day, even if it’s just laughing at my own mistakes.  You know what I’ve
learned?  The problems are still there, but they are not nearly as heavy to
bear.  

I
am now not only in middle age, but on the other side (It’s true, HOW
MANY PEOPLE DO YOU KNOW WHO ARE 100 years old?  Not many, right? Well 53
(my age)+ 53 is over a 100, even in new math).   I know that I
will lose loved ones to death, I already have.  But the joy of the
past 10 years of knowing them without fears, worries, anxieties and
frustrations controlling our life’s produced good memories to help
heal the pain.  Joy over bounds!  And I have the knowledge that
those left behind will have good memories of joyful times when I am
gone, too.  Thank you Lord for reminding me that LIFE is not a
dress rehearsal.  It should be lived with energy, excitement, joy, fun,
family, friends and love.  We should work like it all depends on us, pray
like it all depends on God and never worry about the results.  Why worry
about results…, especially death? God is in control.  Yes, we will all
die.  But look at the promises we have waiting for us on the other side. 
Even death is a reason to celebrate; and, until then we have LIFE, LIFE in the
fullest.  No wonder I am filled with JOY!

Linda
M.